I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
