okay pat passed out under dana's car
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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