Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
