You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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