spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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