i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
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