I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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