is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
