it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
