Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
