every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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