she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
