You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
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