Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize