Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
one two three fourrrrnication!
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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