OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
