If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
