Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize