OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
