That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
so let's talk penis.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Randomize
