I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
