whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Randomize
