...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
