is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Randomize
