I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
