I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
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