What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
