so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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