Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
He literally asked permission to hit on me
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
