there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
