he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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