the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize
