she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
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