I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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