thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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