That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
