She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize