Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Boobs are out for the taking
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize