it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
