if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
