Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
