Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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