woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
