fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
you win again, gameday.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
