You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
