Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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