I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
