so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
