i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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