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We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
