she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
