there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
i need some magic done to my vagina
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize